Do you have acceptance of your life with MS?

Reaching acceptance of your reality as a person with Multiple Sclerosis is tough but totally possible.

Assuming you are no longer struggling with your thoughts and ideas (They say that the mind could be the craziest one at home) as you were when first diagnosed, to reach the acceptance phase you should begin filling your 3 elements: mind, body, spirit with positive fuel.

Start by focusing on the things that you CAN influence and change.

A healthy attitude you should adopt to begin your acceptance journey is to learn not to worry about the things that are out of your hands, things that you cannot control.

The weather is a good example. Think about it, No matter what you say, beg or do you cannot change the weather, therefore, worrying about it is an exercise in futility.

The same thing happens with Multiple Sclerosis. It is a chronic, incurable disease and we both have it.

There is nothing you or I can say, beg or do to change that fact so instead of wasting your precious and valuable time by feeding our anxieties and creating more stress, which is not good especially for us MSers and our families, it's healthy to focus our attention on finding ways to learn to live with it.

Think of the things that you CAN DO RIGHT NOW and give thanks to God for them. I, for example, thank God every morning I am able to get out of bed. There might be one day when doing so would not be so easy but why think about that now? I rather think and appreciate the things and the people that I can enjoy right now. Nobody, with or without MS, knows what tomorrow will be like.

There are days (not a lot nowadays thank God but some) in which I find myself looking for quick emotional & spiritual inspirational quotes, kind of mental pick-me up’s, to help me work thru some rough patches.

My wife told me when she read this last paragraph, that she saw too much emphasis on the word now. I said to her that, That’s exactly where we, MSers, need to direct our attention to as much as possible.

There is a very good book on this by Eckhart Tolle called The Power of Now

The one author that has inspired me to do and get the most out of “this situation” has been doctor Wayne W. Dyer, Ph.D.

I encourage you to seek and read or watch Dr. Dyer’s works. I also like to keep an eye out for presentations and conferences given by Dr. Dyer and this one might be of interest to you:

HOW DO YOU FEED YOUR MIND CORRECTLY?

How do you reach the point of acceptance?

I’ll tell you it is not easy but it is definitely something you must do and believe me, it can be done!

Every person who has received a diagnosis of a chronic illness, in our case we are talking about Multiple Sclerosis, will experience 5 emotional phases. I like to think of these phases as roadside stops in the journey you must make to gain back control of your life.

WHAT ARE THE 5 EMOTIONAL PHASES?

1. DENIAL AND FEAR

2. ANGER
3. BARGAIN
4. DEPRESSION
5. ACCEPTANCE

Let me tell you what my “process” was like:

My first reaction to the doctor’s news was in fact FEAR AND DENIAL. Fear to this thing called Multiple Sclerosis.

I, like a lot of people, didn’t know what MS was. I didn’t have the slightest idea of the seriousness of the situation nor the impact that it would have on me and my family’s lives. These feelings are normal feelings on this journey. The fear is totally normal.

As soon as the medications the doctor had prescribed (a course of oral steroids (meticorten) kick in, and I started to feel good again, the denial started also. This, as I found out later is part of the “process”.

After a few days ANGER became my middle name. I was angry for being dealt this horrendous hand in the game of life, this horrible disease, chronic disease and incurable! This is an ugly phase but one every person in our situation has gone thru.

When the anger subsided the BARGAINING started. Looking back now to the days I was in that phase, I’ll have to confess that I made some outrageous offers to God IF He made this thing go away. Now, believe it or not, I am grateful for my MS.

Bargaining, psychologists say, is also a very common element in this process when faced with news of this kind and is also, the emotional state you’ll run into before falling into DEPRESSION.

You start to think your life is over. That it is not fair to you and your family. That everybody would be better if you were not here.

If you wish to read about MS and depression click right here. What you have to do is go see your neurologist or any medical doctor you feel comfortable with and ask for help.

Today there are really good anti depressants available and from personal experience I must tell you: Do not fall into the trap of thinking that you don’t need any help and that you can do it yourself. The earlier you start taking the medications that will help you get out of the dumps the better.

Once you leave that ugly and dark phase behind, a sort of coming to terms with MS starts to shape your life. Nobody can tell you how long this process to acceptance takes but be 100% sure that you will reach it. Acceptance, like MS, is different for everybody.

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